Sex – from the category of those pleasures, which at first seem unusually sweet and inspiring, but eventually weary. Lovers with experience often prefer to passionate passions a quiet joint holiday or just the opportunity to sleep.
The reasons for reducing libido can be a lotSexless Marriage Causes and Cures . About how widespread the problem can be judged by statistics. So, from 15 to 20% of couples in the US have an intimate relationship less than 10 times a year, which is defined as “sexless marriage.” Such asexuality is fraught with a number of physiological and psychological problems.
But what will happen if you do not succumb to fatigue and cooling relationships, and have sex every day, as if the honeymoon just ended? There are those who checked.
Testing with sex
In general, the 30 Day Sex Challenge (“30 days of daily sex”) is a very popular “test” in recent years that couples with experience from the USA and Europe suit themselves. The Internet is full of reports. For example, one of them is posted on the site BuzzFeedThese Couples Challenged Themselves To Have Sex Every Day .
Three couples who decided to participate in the experiment, set a goal to explore whether a daily intimacy can improve relations and well-being of everyone. Spoiler: the results were contradictory.
The participants admitted that the 30-day sex marathon was not easy for them, and none eventually wanted to continue it after the experiment was over. Although all noted that the connections within the pair have become much deeper and warmer, and life in general has played with new bright colors.
One of the most detailed reportsI Had Sex Every Day For 30 Days – Here’s EXACTLY What Went Down The network was laid out by American Kirsty Carpenter (Kirsty Carpenter). The girl not only described her experience, but also analyzed it. Some conclusions were surprising.
Reasons to start
Kirsty experiment, according to her, spodvigla book American pastor Paul Wirth (Paul Wirth) “30-day sex challenge: a journey to intimacy.” The pastor wrote this work, reflecting on the reasons for the impressive number of divorces recorded in the US.
Wirth came to the conclusion: in order to have a stable relationship, not only spiritual and emotional intimacy is needed, but also intimate.
On Kirsty the book made a great impression. By that time, the girl had been in a relationship for more than four and a half years, and the couple’s passions predictably augured. Like everyone else, Kirsty and her boyfriend M experienced problems, because of what sex was rare – no more than once a month. After attempts to improve the relationship, the number of intimate contacts stabilized at about once a week.
Impressed by the statistics of divorces and not wanting to replenish her, Kirsty decided to arrange herself and a partner a 30-day trial and see what happens.
Not everything turned out smoothly. When the start date was discussed with M., Kirsty was hospitalized with appendicitis. Recovery after the operation stretched for three weeks, so at a time when the doctors finally said: “You can” – Kirsty and her boyfriend flocked enthusiastically under the blanket.
This violated the purity of the experiment: it was assumed that the partners are embarking on a 30-day sex marathon, being already somewhat tired of each other.
However, Carpenter was not going to abandon the idea. When the false start was forgotten, she again started the experiment. This time without notifying M.
Week one: the illusion of non-idealism
How it was
M. noticed that something unusual was happening, only on the fourth day. Before that, daily sex seemed to him to be in the order of things. Kirsty herself was worried about her appearance: in bed, she always tried to cover the scar from the operation, believing that he could push the partner away. But no.
Surprisingly, M. completely did not pay attention to the physical defect of the partner. He just did not notice him.
What this led to
It was then that Kirsti discovered an important fact (by the way, confirmed by scientific researchThe Impact of Body Awareness on Sexual Arousal in Women with Sexual Dysfunction ).
Very often a woman unconsciously ceases to want sex for one reason: she is not sure of her attractiveness. His own body seems to her “fat”, “disproportionate”, “imperfect”. However, men simply do not notice this “imperfection”: in intimate moments they, like M., are completely focused on other things.
What does it mean
Intimacy is the very zone in which you can relax and accept yourself as you are. Relaxing, letting go of our complexes, we increase not only the pleasure from the process, but also increase self-esteem.
Week two: the effect of novelty
How it was
After seven days of everyday sex, the couple became bored, there was a desire to take a break. But Kirsti was determined to solve this problem. And I decided to add diversity to the intimacy.
What this led to
The couple no longer limited to sex exclusively in the matrimonial bed. Alternative parts of the house were tried: a kitchen table, a sofa in the living room, even a carpet in the hallway.
What does it mean
The effect of novelty stimulates sexual desire. The brain is the biggest sex organ, so it is important to constantly awaken curiosity in it. And what if you try so? And like this? And otherwise? If you give vent to the exploratory instinct, continuing the sex marathon will not be as difficult as it seems.
Week three: the re-opening of love
How it was
Kirsty was the first to notice an unusual behavior: in the mornings after a passionate night, she wanted to give M. the opportunity to sleep longer. So she changed the alarm clock again and again. Passion, compared with the first days of the marathon, subsided, and the desire to take care of a partner, on the contrary, became stronger.
What this led to
M. “mirrored” the changed attitude of Kirsty. This manifested itself in the phrase he said: “I do not want to have sex. Just in bed, I want to be as close to you as possible. ” Carpenter notes that about the same she felt during the honeymoon. It seemed that those forgotten relationships had returned to their lives. Kirsty wanted to have sex with M. again and again.
What does it mean
As studies showWomen’s Motivations for Sex: Exploring the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, Fourth Edition, Text Revision Criteria for Hypoactive Sexual Desire and Female Sexual Arousal Disorders , Only 15% of women experience a physiological desire for intima. But every third requires a motive for excitement. This motive can be warm feelings towards the partner. “I, apparently, go into this third of women,” Kirsty noted.
Week four: sex resuscitation relationship
How it was
Realizing that the marathon is coming to an end, the couple was carried away by sex like never before. In the course went and experiments, and viewing porn. It came to the point that M. and Kirsty had sex in the car, where they sat down to go to visit friends.
What this led to
By the end of the 30-day experiment, both were completely exhausted. The first night after the marathon Kirsty and M. did not want to be intimate. But I just wanted to lie in each other’s arms. “I was sure that we would take at least a week of respite: we were so exhausted,” Kirsty recalls. “But instead we made love again in just two days.”
What does it mean
Daily lovemaking is really capable of improving emotional bonding in a couple. Sometimes all that is needed for a relationship to become perfect again is a similar resuscitation. At least, it was to this conclusion that Kirsty came.
Bonuses for the body
Support for warmth and love in a couple, acceptance of your body – not all bonuses that can give a sex marathon. Scientifically proven that regular intimate relationships:
- Reduce the risk of heart attackSexual intercourse and risk of ischemic stroke and coronary heart disease: the Caerphilly study on 50%.
- Increase immunityInfluence of Sex on Immunoglobulin Levels .
- Are able to become an alternative to fitness training of medium intensity, affecting the excess weight and the state of the muscles.
- ReduceSex Yourself To Better Health: 4 Aches And Pains Orgasms Can Cure painful sensations of different origin, including headache and pain with PMS.
- ReduceFrequent ejaculation may decrease prostate cancer risk risk of developing prostate cancer in men.
- Improves sleepThe orgasmic history of oxytocin: Love, lust, and labor due to increased production of a relaxing hormone oxytocin.
And this means that sex is a medicine not only for the soul, but also for the body. Taking it as a course is a great way to solve a lot of life’s problems.
