Cunnilingus is undeservedly considered one of the most complex sexual acts. Apparently, this stereotype comes from another – about the “complexity” and “mystery” of the female genitals. The advice below will refute this absurd opinion.
I will add that Ian Kerner, author of She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide To Pleasuring A Woman, helped me in their creation. I consider it one of the best sex guides, which deals with every aspect of cunnilingus and provides a bunch of techniques.
But let’s finally get to the instructions.
1. Let the partner relax
Many women experience discomfort during cunnilingus. For some, he is associated with complexes about his own smell and taste or with confidence in the “ugliness” of his genitals. Others worry that a man does not like doing this. Still others do not like to be in the limelight and can not relax. As a rule, a woman hypercritically refers to her body, so your eyes, nose and mouth in the most sensitive and vulnerable area of her cause at least slight resistance.
Of course, you can not at once change the partner’s self-awareness. But you can help her relax. Körner says that in many respects success will depend on your perception of oral sex.
One of the main misconceptions about cunnilingus is that it is not as pleasant as a penetrating sexual act. Fact: for a huge number of women everything is exactly the opposite.
Therefore, let the girl understand that you are serious about the process, that for you this is not a prelude to the “main part” and that it really turns you on.
In the chapter entitled “Cunnilingus Manifesto,” Körner cites three postulates that need to be learned by a man in order to enjoy the process together with a partner:
- During cunnilingus, you forget about yourself: now your pleasure depends on her pleasure.
- You do not hurry: it deserves all the time in the world. And you want to enjoy every moment.
- Her smell is exciting, her taste is stunning. And they are both part of the beautiful nature.
If you can show your partner that everything is exactly the way for you, you will be among the few super lovers.
2. Prepare your partner and yourself for a long enjoyment.
The prelude to cunnilingus is another way to relax and excite the girl. Plus it’s just necessary: the clitoris is too sensitive, taking it nagging is not the best solution. So spend your time kissing, hugging, touching, telling about your fantasies. And only when a woman is sufficiently excited, go to the genitals. But there too it is not necessary to hurry: start with light movements of the tongue up and down.
Take into account: even after such preparation, the partner will reach orgasm in an average of 20 minutes. So take care of your comfort.
Make sure your body is in a comfortable extended position. Try to lay your lips and tongue at a 45-degree angle, and not 90-so it will be easier for you. To do this, face the gums in the partner’s body, and head – into her leg. To make this possible, her legs should be close enough to each other.
If you do not like doing cunnilingus lying down, you can kneel by the bed. But, whichever way you choose, make sure that you are comfortable and you are ready to perform all the activities without haste.
3. Master the basic technique
Another important rule: during cunnilingus, it is better to be gentle and methodical, rather than rude and unpredictable. This means that you need to find a way that your partner likes and stick to it.
Körner offers the following basic techniques:
- After preparation, focus on licking the front soldering area (the place directly above the head of the clitoris, where the labia joins). From time to time, caress the clitoris with your tongue and forefinger.
- With increasing excitement, penetrate into the vagina: first with the tongue, then with one or two fingers. But do not reciprocate. It is better to press your fingers against the front wall of the vagina where G should be located, and continue to stimulate the clitoris with the tongue.
- With your free hand, pat your chest, stomach and other erogenous areas of the partner.
This method can be used as a starting point. However, do not forget that every woman has her own preferences. One likes simultaneous oral and manual stimulation, others do not. Some quickly reach orgasm, when the clitoris is licked, others – when they suck. Observe the girl to understand what brings her more pleasure. And even better – ask directly: she certainly knows.
4. And again: pay attention to the front spike
Anterior lip adhesion is a zone that is often ignored in cunnilingus due to its criminal proximity to all known clitoris. Körner also claims that pressure on this area stimulates the body of the internal clitoris (yes, the head is only the tip of the iceberg).
He suggests using the following method: press the upper lip or gum to the place above the clitoral hood and lick the area around the clitoris. If your mouth is at an angle of 45 degrees to the body of a woman, draw a smile of Elvis Presley – this position of the lips will facilitate the process.
5. Prepare for an orgasm
When the partner approaches the finale, Körner advises tightening her legs to tighten the stimulation.
But the more important thing that you should learn is: do not change the rhythm and the way of stimulation (unless the partner requests otherwise).
For most women, stable caresses are the main key to orgasm. Therefore, the very same method, Do not change it. Otherwise, you risk staying in the bedroom with a frustrated girl.
And the last tip: remember that the clitoris is very sensitive after orgasm. Give the partner a break after cunnilingus before moving on to new activities. And of course, do not forget to tell her how you liked everything, and congratulate yourself on a job well done!
